If I was to get married again, here's how it would go down
Our wedding day was magic, we couldn’t fault much - In fact, I only had one regret! Well, two if you count a minor detail, but we can talk about those later. When it’s all said and done though, if I could go back in time with the knowledge I have now it would have been a very different day and I want to share that with you.
As a planner, I really feel for so many of you. That you’re scared of planning or just don’t know where to start. I’m not saying not to go ahead with the wedding of your dreams, but just think about the type of wedding day that is true to you - It might make your life a whole lot easier!
Let’s address this regret being our guest list. We invited people purely for the fact that we attended their wedding and those people have been terrible friends since. In fact, they’ve never really been that amazing full stop. We had a erm, promiscious bridesmaid and an ex thrown in the picture creating a storm of drama, and I’ll hit you with a post-wedding fact - Our Baby-Q had less than half our wedding guests on the invite list. I’m being open about this, because when you have a big wedding it is completely normal. Life happens! It’s exactly the reason why I encourage everyone to think about who is truly important to them. If you’re having trouble, HERE is something I prepared earlier.
All of the above is just a really long-winded way of saying if given the chance again, we would be total savages and only invite our closest friends and family. People we speak to regularly and people that have a genuine interest in our happiness and success.
If we were to have a bridal party at all, I’d be having only my closest, best friends as bridesmaids - One being my sister. There wouldn’t be any of this ‘even numbers’ game whatsoever. They’d also be wearing white, but in a style they chose themselves.
Our ceremony would be held in a beautiful location with meaning to us, in the company of only our closest friends, family and our dogs. Somewhere with views of the water is where we feel most at home, so a secluded bay, a beach or on top of a mountain with a jaw-dropping outlook. There would be no care about the dress code, just about love and our ceremony itself would be written from scratch and totally personalised to us. Afterwards, I’d love to just soak up the moment with our nearest and dearest and sip on bubbles and corona over a picnic in the spot, and if there was a time for a few words to be said, it would be here.
I adore so many dresses on the market, but I think a slinky slip gown with a long trail would be perfect for me. Or, I’d go for the most incredible jump suit imaginable - That would be something straight out of my dreams for sure! I’d totally invest in having my hair and makeup done - Because, special occasion! And I feel so radiatingly beautiful when I take that ‘me’ time to get done up.
We’d still have a photographer and videographer to capture all of the incredible moments with as little staging as possible and people that we would happily spend hours with - Although I’d have no bloody idea who to pick now I know so many incredible people! You can decide for yourself as to who over on the directory HERE.
I don’t think I could get away with having a small evening get together - If you knew my husband you’d understand! The night would be for nothing less than a huge party! My favourite nights are the ones at home where you end up in the spa at midnight or cosy up around the campfire toasting marshmallows and that’s exactly what I’d be channelling. I’d love to have a grand old kiwi ‘backyard’ BBQ, with our favourite cuts of meat (the expensive stuff, because, well, wedding), salads and spuds - oh, and the mother of all platters beforehand! Dessert would probably be a chocolate brownie and ice cream - It’s what all our guests get when they come around for dinner. We wouldn’t bother cutting cakes and I think we’d scrap the first dance (although as a dancer I’m still on the fence about that one), but you can bet your bottom dollar we’ll cut some shapes on the dance floor to our favourite tunes under the spell of rose and a few too many bourbons!
Gone would be the table decorations, and there would be no favours in sight. You might find a few vases filled with stunning arrangements from my talented florist friends though! In my mind, and as much as I appreciate the detail, it’s not what people remember. A wedding is about moments, and special, unique ones at that.
It’s got to be said - I don’t regret our decision back then to have a child-free event with the exception of newborns and immediate family, although with a little one now it would be different. Either way it would be our day and most definitely our decision!
Being a planner it’s almost too easy to drill down to the finest of details. Heck, let’s face it - It’s ingrained into me! Giving you an idea of the look and feel of our day if we were to do it again I feel is an important topic to write about, and something that really should be discussed a lot more. The above ideas and descriptions are us being our truest selves. They focus on us as a couple, what we enjoy and what makes us happy.
Weddings are a celebration of love. They’re not about levelling with your cashed up mates and putting a financial burden on yourselves. A potluck dinner is just as ok as a fully catered spread. BYO bottle is also just as ok as providing free drinks all evening. There are literally no wrongs when it comes to your day, so take a few moments to step back and think about what is going to truly give you the day of your dreams, and if you’re after some advice or a huge helping hand, get in touch with me or any of the other incredible planners on the Christchurch Weddings directory.