Caitlin and Shipley
Our Love Story
Shipley and I met through mutual friends. I remember becoming entranced by these beautiful blue eyes staring at me over the fire pit. That first night we shared jokes and found we had a very similar sense of humour. He remembers me boiling the jug for a cup of tea or two before I left - a sign he would come to recognise as my 30min departure warning. There were several such meetings before our first date at the Wunderbar where we sat and talked for hours, covering all the topics and had our first kiss. We moved in together after only four months - my lease was up and my flat breaking up and us in the honeymoon stage spending almost every night at one of the others' houses it just seemed like the right thing to do. That was almost eight years ago now! We spent almost two months travelling around eastern and central Europe eight months into our relationship and during this time really fell for one another on a deeper level. Everything is just so easy together. For me, I think this was a bit of a test for which he passed with flying colours. When we got back to NZ we started looking at ‘as is where is’ houses and began the next chapter of our lives together as botanical stylist and builder - buying and doing up our first home. The rest, as they say, is history! It's all been smooth sailing and fun times with little pockets of shit in between, but we always work through that together and come out better off.
Our Proposal
We were walking the Able Tasman Track. Shipley had this "perfect idea" of how it was going to go down but hadn't found the place for that perfect spot yet. So on the last night in the park, in the wet & cold we went out for a little beach walk and he proposed near the sea in a beautiful little mossy grove.The next morning we popped out onto this little beach for a coffee and he was like "Ah damn it! This would have been perfect!" You can never know what might be around the next bend!
Our Wedding Planning
I've been involved with many weddings and the thing that stood out to me was making it about the two of you and no one else. Our planning itself had varying degrees of challenge and ease. The festival style I was originally planning was quite hectic and hardgoing. There were lots of people saying they could help but I also found it quite difficult to even know how to enlist that help. It got to the point where we had made several lists and could enlist help to achieve the outcome when we decided to strip it back. The smaller, version was much easier to organise, even with the potluck! We have some fabulous friends that have access to resources like easy-ups and lighting. We also have a massive amount of party gear and decor at Clubhouse (where my studio is) so setting up a mini outdoor party was really quite a breeze - when the guest list goes from 270 to 80 pax, everything just becomes so much easier!
One challenge was coming up with a format for our ceremony. Seeing as what we did was different from the average and we used a friend as a celebrant it was all up to us to get the ceremony right. We have no religious ties, both believing in science and mother earth over more conventional beliefs so a lot of the "normal" ceremony ideas didn't gel with us. When looking at alternative ceremony ideas, knot tying really resonated with us. Not only is it an ancient Celtic tradition - and we both have Celtic ancestry, it also represents binding your lives together and presents an opportunity for a bit of extra ceremony. We still did a ring exchange and wrote some promises together to say with the ring exchange. We planted a tree - well, we potted up a tree, technically. This was significant to us because we love trees and nature - having taken a new name together to start a new clan, we are now the Dacrydium which is taken from the scientific name for the Rimu tree. The tree we planted was a Kahikatea, part of the Dacrydium family of trees-a cousin if you like-and a tree much more suited for the planned planting site. A site much closer to home than where we had our ceremony.
The closer we got to ‘D’ day with our festival-style wedding, the harder things became. We had problems with catering - our original vendors were unvaxxed so had to pull out and everyone else wanted at least double, some even triple what we had budgeted for. No one else seemed capable of grasping the fact that it was super laid back - help yourself to big cauldrons of food style that we wanted. We didn't have a sit-down meal and never intended on having one. That's just not the festival way!
The other important thing for us was the community. Our loved ones and those that we wanted to celebrate with. We are lucky enough to have quite a large community-which was a blessing and a curse. Our original guest list was over 200 pax - though my very large family accounted for about 80 of those. As time drew closer to the day and that blasted Rona was showing no signs of letting up, we slashed the guest list, changed the venue and brought everything right back to basics. We actually ended up having two weddings - one in Ōtautahi with our immediate family and friends and one at my parents' place in the Waikato with my giant extended family and some other friends who chose to attend the Waikato party over the Ōtautahi one. The most important thing for us was having fun and not spending a fortune. If anything started to become too hard or too expensive it was cut.
Our Wedding Day
Prior to any of our set-up, Shipley and I slipped off to the beach for a coffee and went over our promises together. That was a really beautiful moment, before any of the hustle and bustle of the day.
We next got to work finishing the set-up. I had written several lists that people chipped away at. I was doing my own flowers so I set up the ceremony space then left the crew to finish off the list and use up the rest of the flowers as they saw fit. My hair and makeup artist caught Covid so couldn't make it - I only found out the night before! Luckily I had brought my own make-up and the things I thought I might need for hair back-ups. The girls and I did our own hair and makeup in the communal bathrooms at the campground and then headed to my parents' tent to get dressed and make the finishing touches.
We had a first look and a wee photo session with the wedding party down at the cave and then made our way back for the ceremony. Following our ceremony we had some photos, then headed to the communal area for cheese and pickles nibbles. At that point, I got changed into my second outfit and we cut into our cheese tower which took place of a wedding cake. This was followed by a couple of short speeches and a toast. Once the sun started to sink we set off back up the hill for some photos with the bays in the background. The BBQs were fired up and when we got back to camp the meats and veg kebabs were being cooked, ready to add to the salads and bread. People were encouraged to eat as and when they saw fit. We enjoyed lots of music, dancing and plenty of ‘shit talk’ to follow.
Our Advice
Think about what you really want from the day as well as your immediate future. I am so pleased we stripped it back, we saved an easy $10k that we can now put towards building our dream house on wheels! That dream is so much closer now that we didn't put ourselves into mega debt for this one weekend. We were also very lucky that my parents are super chill, they were happy to contribute financially with no expectations on how we should spend it or what the day should look like.
Stand out vendors
Em was bloody wonderful! We had a great time with her and absolutely love the photos and moments she captured for us.
Our Dream Team
Venue | Okains Bay Camping Ground
Photographer | Emily Hugo
Florals, Planning & Styling | Freya Flora
Catering | BBQ selection provided by us. Salads, bread, desserts etc ''Potluck" provided by guests.
Celebrant | Our good friend Dom - we did the paperwork at the office.
Dress | Ru de Seine from Paperswan Bride. The second dress was made by Caitlin.
Bride Accessories | Necklace - brought years ago in Turkey, Odd earrings - one Caitlin’s Mums vintage pearl and one was a pear look t-rex purchased on a trip to Sydney.
Bridesmaids Outfits | Dotti
Groom Attire | Pants - 3 Wise Men, Shirt - Cutler & Co, Jacket - Working Style, Hat - Originally Caitlin’s from Fallen Broken Street, stitched with a matching band from the same fabric as her skirt on the day
Groomsmen Outfits | Sourced their own based on our colour palette
Rings | Marama Jewellery
Cheese Tower | Canterbury Cheesemongers
Glassware & Lawn Games | Little Hire Company
SUP & Kayaks | KORE hire